When you get a woman’s number and you’re picking up the phone to call and “ask her out”, does it bother you?
Do you get freaked out?
Do you start thinking about exactly what you’re going to say, how you’re going to say it, how to deal with her rejecting you… etc.?
Do you ever get NERVOUS when you’re dialing the phone?
You know that feeling when you just start getting anxious for no logical reason, and you just CAN’T control it?
Have you ever had to actually HANG UP because you were so damn freaked out… and you just couldn’t follow through with it?
OK, now another set of interesting questions…
Have you ever called a woman, and started talking to her, only to realize that she was in a COMPLETELY different mood from the last time?
Have you ever had a woman “turn cold” on you all of a sudden?
It’s almost like you’re talking to a different person from the girl you met just a day or two before… and it makes no sense to you… right?
And finally…
Have you ever worked up the nerve to call, gotten her on the phone, had a great conversation, but when it came time to ask her out, you froze up because you didn’t know what to say?
Or even worse, have you ever gotten to the end of the conversation and asked her out, only to have her answer with:
“Well, maybe… call me Friday afternoon… OK?”
or…
“Actually, I’m going to be busy all this week, but thanks for asking… (silence)” …?
Have you ever had one of those conversations where you could just TELL that something wasn’t right… and that she wasn’t going to be taking you up on your date offer, or calling you back at all anytime soon?
So why all the problems?
What is it about this particular few minutes of time that constantly ends in problems for guys? I personally think that this issue comes down to a few key DEEPER ISSUES.
And I think that if you don’t have these other issues “handled”, you’re going to keep running into problems… and NEVER even know WHY…
…which sucks.
I mean, it’s bad enough to keep having a particular problem and not figure out how to solve it… but the idea that the solution is in doing something you would never think of is a little bit maddening.
In other words, I think that this is all about understanding the problem, and actually PREVENTING it from coming up… rather than trying to “solve it” in the moment.
Heeding advice from friends living in New York City, Allison turned to the Internet. “There weren’t a lot of people using the Internet to date back then,” she says. “I had to go to Kinko’s and scan in a picture of myself for my profile.” Soon after that, she was on a date.